It is no doubt that Valentine’s season is about love. But beyond it, God’s love is the greatest. 1 Corinthians 1:13 says God is love. Let’s always celebrate the joy-infused, self-donating, and open-hearted kind of love that God models for us. When we do this, we build true intimacy and offer vulnerability for our loved ones. For a Grinch, the day comes with many insignificant ideas and superficial expectations. Valentine’s Day portrays a shallow picture of love which is the reality for many people.
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Intense Pressure
Shrewd behavior and abuse wrapped up in fear cannot substitute for love. Apostle John affirms that perfect love casts fear because there is no fear in love. However, whoever fears has not been perfected in love. If anyone professes his love for God and hates his brother, such person is a liar 1 John 4:18-20. We loved God because he first loved us.
Overburdening someone with fear and shame is not love; rather, it’s hate. This is what happens when you are made to feel bad for not being grateful for flowers and candy from a negligent and inhuman partner. Although it can be painful, it is more loving to confront sin, much more loving to give someone a chance to own sin and repent to growing in Christ. Christ’s love is sacrificial, which is why his love was cloaked in blood. When it seems like we no longer feel his love, it is safe to seek wise and godly help.
Fearful Gifting
Imagine you are lactose intolerant, and your better half buys you a bar of milk chocolate; you will think, “what’s wrong with him?” Or when she dislikes expensive gestures, and you still go ahead to gift her $200 earrings, she might not be hyped about it.
However, some recipients can be difficult to please, making it challenging for the gift-giver to keep up with the ever-changing desires. We can recall that in Exodus 5, the Israelites were consistent with delivering their proportion of bricks; rather than being pleased, Pharoah overwhelmed them with more burden. A partner or spouse who does the same is a dictator. Love should not be made to feel or look like slavery because it is not. Love should be free, effortless, and always vulnerable.
Repercussion Of a Greedy Cupid
If you feel trapped, insufficient, and fearful, it is okay to speak up. Or, if the situation feels unsafe, it is best to involve someone supportive and trustworthy. It can be a brother, father, or Pastor. But if the situation is safe, you can consider talking to your significant other before Valentine’s Day.
Anxiety and pressure are just a sign of hectic day-to-day problems which can be overcome by resolution to the glory of God. The Lord does not want us to be in relationships or friendships with people who only make empty promises but are acquitted of sin and genuine repentance. This caliber of people will push you into darkness. The scripture records that we are light in the Lord and we should walk as children of light, Ephesians 5:7-10. There is an opportunity for growth in Christ, to see the wonder he can make out from your courage and faith.
Love is Not Any Of These
These are some modifiers to help identify Oppressive “love:”
Stressful: It feels like nothing else matters because you are trying to thread every needle to make someone happy or at least not angry, leaving you with little or no time to pray.
Negotiable: The gift-giver expects praise in return for a gift and expects you to overlook sin.
Indifferent: When the giver pays little or no attention to your preference even though they know. For instance, perfume makes you sneeze, but he still gifts you a perfume bottle.
Genuine Love Unites
Real Christian love warmly learns to serve the other person. And with two people mutually doing this in God’s honoring ways, the bond becomes stronger.
Bottom Line
A healthy relationship reveals the truth that God’s grace for us is the most significant gift we’ve ever received. There is no assurance that we can pay Christ back for the bloodshed on the cross. However, it is no longer to our dismay that he did this because he loves us and so that we can reign with him eternally.
Christ gave his life despite the shame and agony Hebrew 12:2. Gospel love is glorious and joyous! We should never forget that we are God’s people before each other’s. Jesus’s love is a work in progress “Whoever says he abides in him should walk in the same way Christ walked” 1 John 2:6.
Chances are some people will say, “Brighten up! Valentine’s Day is a bit of fun!” And, for believers, the most loving day of the year is Good Friday, when Christ laid down his life for us. February 14 is a “warm tenderness day” similarly. Your closest buddies will send you love emojis and sentimental greeting cards. But this should not cloud your judgments about valentine’s day hence always show love because Christ loves you!